I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
