Non-Jews are for practice
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
and you fell through a lawn chair
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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