what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Randomize