well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
