My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
