Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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