Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
i think my cat just said my name.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
