we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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