this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
