that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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