Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
bring money and cleavage
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
