The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
