i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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