it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
