I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
