He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
