if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
