my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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