We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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