I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Randomize
