My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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