did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You've changed since you got that strap on
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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