He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
