So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize
