WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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