I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize