I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Blood and glitter go together right?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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