Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
