nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
one two three fourrrrnication!
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
