i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
my being single is dangerous.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
