Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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