what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
bring money and cleavage
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
