that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Randomize
