I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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