After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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