I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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