Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
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