was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
