So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
