Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
i dont even know how to be here
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize