until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize