I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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