I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
