Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
