STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
