you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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