Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
