He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I need to sanitize my soul.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
