OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
