She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
this beer tastes like vomit already
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
