Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
